Melissa,

CAN you really ever be friends with a past love, regardless of how the relationship turned out

I'm in a separation process at the moment. I have two kids. So I have to be friends with my ex. Not only because of my children but because I spent 18 years of my life with her. We don’t hate each other, she doesn’t love me anymore.

The answer to your question must be YES…

would you ever make an attempt to get back into that person's life in a romantic way

At the moment I would say YES I would. But then I’m biased. I love (am in love with) my ex… She isn’t….

KiD

Thanks for the honesty Heartache...I know how tough it is...I also had a past relationship...the "one that got away" that also said he didn't love me anymore...crushed me for a few years. I have learned a lot since moving back to where the "ex" is, from mutual aquaintances and know that he was just trying to push me away because he wasn't happy with himself.

I just moved back to Washington State recently (where the "one that got away" still lives) and am debating whether to call him to just see how he is doing. I don't want to get hurt a second time but I know he has grown up a lot and gotten his life together. I am trying to find out if I can be adult enough to handle a friendship with him.

Good luck on keeping the civil relationship with your soon to be ex - maybe, through having the kids as a common ground, there is hope down the road for you...if not...hopefully time and distance will help....

Melissa

I was in a relationship with my ex for 10 years. We have tried to be friends. Yet, he doesn't know how to be a friend to anyone. His up bringing really ruined that for him. Once we both fell out of love with one another. There just wasn't anything left. If the two of you we're friends, before you were lovers. There should be a friendship there always. Me & what's his name, werent' friends before we were lovers.